You know you’re from NOO JOISEY if:
1. You’ve been seriously injured at Action Park.
2. You don’t think of citrus when people mention “The Oranges”.
3. You know that it’s called Great Adventure, not Six Flags.
4. You’ve ordered a hard roll with butter for breakfast.
5. You’ve known the way to Seaside Heights since you were seven.
6. You’ve eaten at a diner, when you were stoned or drunk, at 3 a.m.
7. You remember that the “Two Guys” were from Harrison.
8. You know that the state isn’t one big oil refinery.
9. At least three people in your family still love Bruce Springsteen
and you know what town Jon Bon Jovi is from.
10. You know what a “jug handle” is.
11. You know that a WaWa is a convenience store.
12. You know that the state isn’t all farmland.
13. You know that there are no “beaches” in New Jersey – there’s “The
Shore”, and you know that the road to the shore is “The Parkway”, not
he “Garden State Highway”.
14. You know that “Piney” isn’t referring to a tree.
15. Even your school cafeteria made good Italian subs. And you call it
a “Sub” not a “submarine sandwich” or worse yet, a “hoagie” or a “hero”.
16. You remember the song from the Palisades Park commercials.
17. You know how to properly negotiate a Circle.
18. You knew that the last question had to do with driving.
19. You know that this is the only “New…” state that doesn’t require
“New” to identify it (like, try…Mexico, …York, …Hampshire –
doesn’t work, does it?)
20. You only go to New York City for day trips, and you only call it
“The City”.
21. You know that a “White Castle” is the name of BOTH a fast food chain
AND a fast food sandwich.
22. You consider a corned beef sandwich with lettuce and mayo a
sacrilege.
23. In the 80’s, you wore your hair REALLY high.
24. You don’t think “What exit” is very funny.
25. You know that the first “strip shopping center” in the country is Route.
26. You know that people from 609 area code are “a little different”.
27. You know that no respectable New Jerseyan goes to Princeton – that’s
for out-of-staters.
28. The Jets-Giants game has started fights at your school or local bar.
29. You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls.
30. You can see the Manhattan skyline from some part of your town.
31. You refer to all highways and interstates by their numbers.
32. Every year, you had a least one kid in your class named Tony.
33. You know where every “clip” shown in the Sopranos opening credits is.
34. You’ve gotten on the wrong highway trying to get out of the Willowbrook
Mall.
35. You’ve been to at least one mall in Paramus.
36. You know that people from North Jersey go to Seaside Heights, and
people from South Jersey go to Wildwood. It can’t be the other way around.
37. You were not raised in New Jersey. You were raised in either North
Jersey, Central Jersey or South Jersey.
38. You don’t consider Newark or Camden to actually be part of the state.
39. You remember the stores Korvette’s, Rickel’s, Channel, Bamburger’s
and Orbach’s.
40. You’ve eaten a Boardwalk cheesteak with vinegar fries.
41. You start planning for Memorial Day weekend in February. Andfinally…
42. You’ve never pumped your own gas.
And a couple of my own:
43. You know that the only people who say “joisey” are from New York.
44. It’s “rowt 22” not “root 22”
45. You know that Acme is a grocery store, not just the place where theWile E Coyote ordered his gadgets from.
46. Instead of Market Basket and Shaw’s, you had PathMark and ShopRite
47. You know what a Tastykake is.
